3 Big Mistakes Most Guys in Relationships Make…

 

That Keep Them Feeling Trapped, Resentful & Feeling Disconnected From Their Partner

by Kurt Frost

It may sound cliched, but we live in difficult times for men.  The demands of work and family can spread your time and energy thin and our “A.D.D culture” makes it really hard to focus on what is important without the next thing immediately demanding our attention.  

As a result, guys get lost, and when we do, we lose touch with ourselves and what makes our lives exciting and full of  meaning.  Less meaning and excitement creates frustration, builds resentment and causes anxiety. Not only anxiety over feelings of overwhelm, that we can’t keep up, but a growing hopelessness that we are failing. That we may never live the life we want.  This loss of self fulfillment comes back to hurt our relationships, family and generally the world around us.

Pretty depressing, eh? You may find yourself wondering how you got to this point, but there are definitely 3 big mistakes that most guys make that will pretty much guarantee getting stuck here.  You’ve probably made at least 1 of them if not all 3.

  1. Not Taking Care of Yourself

Most guys are bad at taking care of themselves.  It looks different for everyone, but some common examples of poor self care are:

  • Lack of exercise
  • Poor diet
  • Lack of time for yourself
  • Lack of time with other male friends
  • Poor sleep
  • Many more…

It happens for many reasons, but as you try to take care of everyone else, you do less and less for yourself and, over time, you end up being last in the quest to make sure everyone else is OK.  

This is definitely a recipe for disaster, as the less you do for your own well being, the less you have to give, much less function well in your life.

 

  1. Poor Communication with Partner

The effects of this one are probably the most obvious and at the surface for most guys in their relationships:

  • Feeling like you and your partner are “missing each other”:  your partner is not getting what you mean and you feel misunderstood by them too.
  • Being confused by your partner’s shifts in moods towards you: one minute you feel close and the next you are a jerk.
  • As much as you try to explain your thoughts about something, your partner is resistant and even antagonistic.  Maybe avoiding each other, or difficult subjects.
  • The list goes on…

Continued miscommunication in a relationship is toxic and will only increase the distance between you and your partner. This will undermine the rest of your life too, leading to effects in your self care and sense of purpose…..it is all connected!

 

  1. Not Living With Purpose

Living on purpose means you live your life in a way that makes you feel energized and alive.  

If you don’t know where you are going, you won’t know how to get there….or even know if you got there.  It is like sailing a boat; if you don’t have your destination in sight, you will veer off course. And if you know anything about sailing, that is not a good thing.

Life purpose is a verb, not a noun. You need to “do” your life purpose in little ways each  and every day.  Your purpose isn’t a goal, per se, but rather a way of being that you need to keep checking in with to see if you are on track.  

Put another way, it is you engaging all of you and feeling like you are moving towards a better version of yourself.

A big sign that you are not living with purpose is if you are feeling frustrated that your life is being defined for you by your partner, your kids, your boss, etc., etc., etc.  It feels controlling and leaves men often feeling angry and resentful.

All of this can change!

As you have seen, there are many ways for your life to get off track, but there are also many solutions you can implement to help you claim the life you desire and start living with the purpose you deserve.  

Men need their own space to get back in touch with what feels right. The Power of Purpose Retreat For Men does this. During this retreat you will address these 3 exact problems and leave with the solutions you need to be happier and excited about your life again! Find out how we will accomplish this here…